Book list
From Booklist, Copyright © American Library Association. Used with permission.

Three moms of boys with autism spectrum disorder share words of wisdom about navigating the loss of the life they imagined. The self-described “storytellers, advocates, friends” avoid sugar-coating the situation. “I hated all my friends who had neurotypical kids,” admits Kate Swenson, the Minnesota mom of Cooper, 13, diagnosed with severe, nonverbal autism. Each shares touching, wrenching, and funny stories of their experiences. They also describe their roles as caregivers and explain terms for their children’s behavior, like perseverating (fixating on, say, clock radios or wind chill) and sundowning (getting restless and uneasy in the late afternoon and evening). Some kids struggle with a trifecta of autism, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Jack, now 20, used to wash his hands as often as 30 times a day. Memorably, he tells his mom that he thinks the lion in The Wizard of Oz had autism because he was afraid all the time. These “show, don’t tell” details should provide comfort and hope for other families in the “autism club” who want to redefine success.

Publishers Weekly
(c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved

In this empathetic memoir–cum–parenting manual, bloggers Swenson (Forever Boy), Cariello (What Color Is Monday), and Wood take turns discussing lessons they learned from raising children on the spectrum. Swenson recounts anxious years waiting for her son, who was diagnosed with autism at age three, to reach developmental milestones, only to conclude that she should instead take his happiness as the benchmark of success, while Wood meditates on how she gradually came to terms with the fact that her son would require her help long after her other children moved out. Elsewhere, Cariello details how for years she carried around guilt over spending more time with her autistic son than her other children, only to learn after they had all grown up that her neurotypical children didn’t remember things that way. The guidance is broad, as when Swenson emphasizes the importance of community by recalling how starting a blog about her parenting experiences connected her with other moms, but the consistently affirmational tone will help parents navigate the complex emotions of raising kids on the spectrum (“When you’re a caregiver, tears are a sign of bravery, admitting weakness is a sign of strength,” Wood writes). This will be a balm for parents of autistic children. Agent: Jennifer Weis, Weis Agency. (Apr.)